The Curveball
We are now well into baseball season here in the United States. “America’s Pastime” is beloved by many and is responsible for many of the metaphors we use in life: step up to the plate for boldly facing an obstacle or challenge; swing if it’s close to mean give it a try and see what happens; swing for the fences when we want to take a risk that may result in an important outcome or big reward; it’s a whole new ballgame when the environment, expectations or rules have changed; you only score when you cross the plate to indicate continued effort and follow through until the end; and, watch out for the curveball when something unexpected comes our way.
The signature path of the curveball is to curve mid-air in a direction designed by the pitcher and catcher, but unknown to the batter. The ball is seemingly headed right into the batter’s strike zone, only to curve off and out of reach at the last second. Baseball threw itself a few curveballs this year, modifying some rules and equipment to ensure the game stayed relevant and interesting for sponsors, players and fans. It took some getting used to, but has ultimately resulted in some renewed popularity in the game.
I’ve recently been thrown a few curveballs myself–situations I understood or hoped to go one way that ended up unexpectedly very different. In a few circumstances, even though I did my best to anticipate the unexpected, things came at me differently than planned (and certainly differently than desired!), and left me feeling like a vulnerable batter in the batter’s box. Other times, I felt more like the pitcher as I indicated a path in one direction only to mix it up, intentionally or accidentally, upon execution.
Curveballs aren’t always negative–sometimes they can be a pleasant surprise, like when:
A gift you aren’t expecting arrives in the mail;
A detour route introduces a whole new interesting area or location;
Someone says they want to give you some “feedback” and they sing your praises instead of pointing out your flaws;
The social event you were dreading leads to some fun new friendships.
Curveballs happen and you can better anticipate and manage those that come your way with intention. Consider how you might:
Take some time to process what's happened: it's okay to feel shocked, angry, or sad. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of your expectations or plans.
Talk to someone you trust: talking about what’s happening and what you're going through can help you make sense of it and move on.
Make a plan: once you've had some time to process what's happened, you can start to make a plan for moving forward.
Acknowledge and be grateful for the curveballs with positive impacts or results: this can bring joy in the moment and help you build optimism and resilience.
On occasion, we can anticipate curveballs beforehand or adjust to them while in process. Sometimes they cause frustration, delay or even harm–other times, they open up new opportunities and perspectives. In all situations we can be like the batter: focused and flexible; and like the pitcher: poised and in control (most of the time…). Yes, there may be negative consequences, but if you never step up to the plate and wait for your pitch, you won’t have the opportunity to get a hit…or swing for the fences. And if you strike out, reflect on why without blame or shame. Remember: there will be another chance to step up to the plate again–this time with a better bat and the wisdom to know how to use it.